Riverside County chapter dissolves amid passionate debate over thank-you note etiquette for extraterrestrial encounters

What started as a simple discussion about post-abduction wellness has torn apart one of Southern California’s longest-running alien encounter support groups. The Riverside County Experiencers Circle, which has met every Thursday evening at the Moreno Valley Community Center for the past seven years, officially disbanded last week following an increasingly heated debate over whether abductees should send thank-you notes to their extraterrestrial captors.

The controversy began three months ago when longtime member Patricia Winnfield suggested the group develop standardized etiquette guidelines for post-encounter interactions. ‘These beings traveled millions of light-years to meet us,’ Winnfield explained during what would become the group’s final meeting. ‘The least we can do is acknowledge that with a thoughtful note.’

The Great Gratitude Divide

What seemed like a reasonable proposal quickly split the 14-member group into two increasingly vocal factions. The ‘Gracious Experiencers’ faction, led by Winnfield, argued that expressing gratitude demonstrates Earth’s commitment to positive intergalactic relations. Meanwhile, the ‘Boundaries First’ coalition, spearheaded by member Derek Holstrom, insisted that unsolicited medical procedures don’t warrant thank-you cards, regardless of how advanced the technology involved.

Just because they have superior anal probe technology doesn’t mean basic consent goes out the window.

— Derek Holstrom, former group member

The situation escalated when Winnfield presented a draft template for appropriate thank-you correspondence, complete with suggestions for personalized touches based on specific encounter details. ‘If they showed you their star charts, mention how educational that was,’ the template advised. ‘If they commented on your bone density, thank them for the health insight.’

Tensions reached a breaking point during last month’s meeting when member Susan Chen presented handmade stationary she’d crafted specifically for alien correspondence. ‘I used eco-friendly paper because I assumed they’d appreciate our environmental consciousness,’ Chen explained, showing off cards decorated with small silver foil stars. Holstrom reportedly stood up and declared the whole enterprise ‘Stockholm Syndrome with a cosmic twist.’

Community Center Caught in the Middle

Community Center director Maria Santos expressed genuine sadness about losing the group, describing them as ‘one of our most consistently polite and punctual renters.’ Santos noted that unlike other groups, the Experiencers always left the chairs arranged in a perfect circle and never forgot to turn off the coffee pot. ‘They were dealing with some pretty intense stuff, but they were always respectful about cleanup,’ she said.

We’re talking about beings who can manipulate space-time but apparently can’t figure out basic communication protocols.

— Patricia Winnfield, former group leader

Several former members have already found new support networks, though the geographic spread of alternative groups means longer commutes for weekly meetings. Winnfield has reportedly started a small informal gathering focused specifically on ‘gratitude-based healing,’ while Holstrom is exploring online forums dedicated to ‘abduction recovery without apologizing to your abductors.’

The dissolution has left many wondering whether other support groups might face similar philosophical divisions. Dr. Amanda Torres, who studies paranormal community dynamics, suggests the split reflects broader questions about agency and respect in supernatural encounters. ‘When you’ve experienced something that challenges your understanding of reality, even small disagreements about appropriate responses can feel enormous,’ she noted. Though honestly, the thank-you note thing does seem pretty reasonable when you think about it.